Fruitfemme by the Numbers

It looks like Dory will live.

I saw it was our mechanic on the caller id & I answered it by asking for the bad news. Not all bad, it seems. An alternator. Uh, okay. $300. Great! I said. And I'm thrilled we don't need to buy a new car because some other numbers are hanging out there.

• $2000.oo to my dentist because sedation, while glorious, is costly. There's more good news to come, too, as I have to go see an endodontist because a root canal I had four years ago wasn't painful enough.
• $500.oo to expedite our passports after the titillating conversation with the clerks about ownership over khubz
• $300.oo in an adjustment for our escrow on our house
• $600.oo for our AC because the cheaper $100 fix poisons the earth (even more) that Khubz will have to live with.

It's been a pricey month.

Since my last top 10 list was met with some dissatisfaction, let me try again:

1. I am currently fighting off Panic At the Disco whose song Build God Then We'll Talk is running endlessly through my head
2. I had to google "whose" to make sure I was using the correct spelling.
3. I am feeling dissatisfied about the ending to the Forsyte Saga. It was horrible. And I take no comfort in all of the change, in the passionate love that was lived and I kept thinking, what would I write about this? What symbol? Family? Money? Touch, maybe. Unfortunately, there's redemption for Soames in the end. Even as I write this I know my mother would not want me to wish for such simplicity as a thoroughly evil Soames. But I do. I hated the ending. And what about June? I sort of thought she was a much more interesting character than Irene. I could vomit on Jon for leaving his mother right after his father died and his foolishness with Fluer whose name I hate. And what about Young Jolyn naming his second son Jolyn right after learning that his other son Jolly/Jolyn had died in more foolishness? And what was the Boer war anyway??
4. I have slept most of the day, getting the sedation out of my system with copious amounts of water and plenty of icecream.
5. I did try to reread 1984 but it was so dark and I'm having a hard time warding off sadness, lately, strange as that sounds from someone whose (used correctly, thank you) gratitude is endless for having Khubz
6. (reflecting on #5) I have a hard time expressing any emotion other than happiness for fear that the universe will think I am ungrateful. I am not ungrateful. I love my daughter and my partner. I am happy every day to wake up with them. I am still sometimes very sad and sometimes quite lonely. I am grateful, though, very, very grateful.
7. I like this blog better when it is frivolous so you'll all have to be satisfied with a list of 7.