Theory & Practice

We got to spend the evening with Funk. The girl was a blast. We had a living room picnic and feasted on grapes, played with baby dolls, played upstairs in Khubz's room, changed diapers and got into Pjammies, wiped noses with ease and effortlessly laid down for the night before 8:30.


Now here's a more detailed reflection on the evening.

I have no idea how women with more than one child do anything. And the two children I had with me were good children. They did not bite, scratch, claw or flee. They were ideal children. And I still have no idea how parents with two or more children do anything.

You are astonishing.

I made a few tactical errors. Luckily, the girl children were both forgiving (Funk was more forgiving than Khubz, truth be told). If you have one child and are thinking about borrowing another, I encourage you to avoid these key missteps:

• Do not assume that your child will accept the other child sitting in her booster seat.
• Do not assume that your child will peacefully eat while sitting in your lap even though she always, always wants to be in your lap rather than in her own seat
• Do not assume there is no difference between how milk tastes in a green cup versus a pink cup
• Do not assume you can put your child down to sleep in her crib and then walk out of the room while holding the other child.
• Do not assume your child will not contact the dark overlord to punnish you for trying to put her down while still holding another child.
• Do not assume that the borrowed child will be glad to hear the same books or songs you saw at her house.
• Do not disregard when the borrowed child says, "no. no. no. Mah Mommy does. Mah Mommy." Stop singing that personal penguin song immediately. Back away from the Itsy Bitsy Spider. Do not make any move towards the Hungry, Hungry Catapillar.

In truth we had a blast! There was much sharing of toys and playing together and discussions about "Mah Baby" or "Mah Khubz" or "Mah Noise." Khubz replied with her newfound pronunciation of "funkie" Funk was totally wonderful about eating her cottage cheese, bread, ground beef, bananas, grapes and milk. We watched one video and mostly played & had a great time together.

My most important tip is: do not assume you should not have the party.

It really was a blast.